So anyway I use the Dial Soap Antibacterial awesome, bro It is colored translucent orange But don’t dare eat it though it’s not like corn Now I pump my soap dispenser But nothing globs onto my member So I conclude that the bottle’s empty Now I’m at Walmart making my entry I find the section that sells the soap Antibacterial awesome, bro I find the Dial Soap on the shelf And the price is four twelve Oh my goodness I start to holler But then I see a sign for three dollars It is the Walmart brand of soap Sitting next to the Dial Soap And it’s cheaper because it’s generic brand And it’s not orange, it’s tan So I finally make my decision And buy the generic brand and end my mission [chorus x 2:] Soap

I’m so happy that I am rapping Rapping is fun it’s very challenging I am MCB the rapper Driving around inside my tractor With the dope skill super dope rap style When I rap it’s like vomiting black bile Cuz all the words come out all syrupy But then I get up and rap more cheerily And now my rap is dope full of hope And really long like rope When I lasso you with my rap song You’ll probably never believe it’s that long Cuz I never do stop I always go till I reach the top And then I stop and look back at what I did And now I’m even more famous than Euclid

Hip hop and you don’t stop I’m like casting off at the boat launch With a mummy chug rapping on the boat prow With a butcher knife chopping that mullet cow I’m back on the track with a rap that’s wack MCB with tan slacks I’m here to show how rap is done First you need to go pack a gun Now just throw on a beat that’s funky Then all you do is count your money MCB the mammoth Causing a famine eating everyone’s sandwich Now I’m back with two hands to clap Legs that walk fast while my mouth raps Throwing candy out to the crowd Floating around in my bloody blouse To my ex-girlfriend from me MCB I still love thee This is a rap I wrote straight for you To remind you how much I still love you

Everybody brace yourself for another funky rap Cuz look who opened the door MCB is back MCB, go, go! You are awesome I like the way you flow And plus you are very romantic I must mention your boots are gigantic They have thick tread plus they’re black And the soles are waterproof Aqua Man MCB wears boots and you better believe me I saw him with my 3-D Goggles hanging out at the park where Playing my make-believe after dark when Suddenly oh no help me please Giant knees of MCB Down attached down further still The super large super ill Massive large black boots Smoking and tripping is all you do MCB my name is Bryan I can’t help you my boots are giant Everybody brace yourself for another funky rap Cuz look who opened the door MCB is back Watch out my hair grows down to my ankles And I executively produced the Bangles But they never paid me so now I’m here With a chain connecting my nose to my ear Did you ever notice this one thing though Britney Spears always copies my clothes It’s not a coincidence it’s totally obvious She even copies my totally throbbing chest And crooning vocals look at the locals They are carving my face in totem poles out of focus Now I cold set my watch to the right time Cuz it was one full hour behind Now I gotta go dang that was fast Now I’m late for my ballet class Everybody brace yourself for another funky rap Cuz look who opened the door MCB is back Oh boy another funky beat I’m MCB and this is quite a treat To be rapping for you so here I go MCB with a tight new flow I’m surfing like crazy riding the waves, G Now I’m on the beach and I’m talking to ladies Hi ladies I’m MCB Do you hear me rapping this funky beat Oh MCB we sure do we heard you And plus your shirt’s blue Oh do you like my shirt because it’s blue now, ladies Yes we do it cold drives us crazy Oh now I’m happy cuz before I came I was thinking this blue shirt was totally lame Oh no MCB that shirt is cool Precisely because that shirt is blue And it really looks fair with your real long hair That is down to your ankles way down there Thanks for the compliment, ladies Now I must leave and ride the waves, G Cuz you know that I’m surfing crazy Bye MCB we love you, baby Everybody brace yourself for another funky rap Cuz look who opened the door MCB is back

Once when I woke up inside of a pond I was noticing both of my arms were gone Then when I scraped off the blood and soot I had noticed a bear trap was on my foot So I chewed my leg off and then I left When I came to some quicksand up to my neck But I have no arms so my means of escape Are considerably diminished wouldn’t you say Just then I feel a tug on my hair And suddenly I’m pulled up out of there And here is my trusty horse pulling me out My trusty horse saved me with his snout Now I’m kissing and thanking him and spitting out sand And I’m trying to pet him but I have no hands MCB rock hard MCB in

One time I almost destroyed a rollercoaster By constantly ramming its foundation with a stroller Hello y’all my name’s MCB I’m the one in the forest with enormous feet Now I’m chilling with the yogis playing some soccer I don’t drink wine cuz wine is a mocker I’m a heroin guy cuz heroin rules All the girls are talking to me and thinking I’m cool Cuz I’m eating a baloney and heroin sandwich Everything I say sounds suspiciously Spanish So I’ll stop now OK I can’t I’m addicted to rap because I’m totally wack One time there was a mouse who looked like Martin Buber But I hooked it up into my supercomputer So now I’m out surfing the waves with roller skates And then a seagull came pecking my pate Brooklyn home of the thieves and the knaves I’m MCB with a laser ray When I crawl from the soil and grip my tombstone You will then know I’m ready to groove slow Mmm pump the beat like that Alien spaceship stole my cat Now I’ll tell you a story here That is twice as awesome and twice as weird Once I was in the army Then I heard a sound that was total alarming So I ran all around flailing my arms Then I noticed I’m on a farm So when I tried to milk the cow It cold stands up and kicks me, pow That was no cow, that was my boss Now I’m using some dental floss And bleeding so bad I die of cancer MCB with massive antlers On the mike MCB Voodoo doctor the caveman petting an octopus with my hair uncombed Now I think someone’s trying to call me Hello hello? Hi I’m your dolly OK I’ll meet you on the corner of Skiff Where it intersects Schermerhorn south of Cliff Somebody cut all my dreadlocks off Dang Bry these are some red hot socks Although it looks like a bathing trough It’s really a urinal oh my gosh Check out a style that’s dope for you When I stick out my tongue while poking you I’m action man driving my action van Waving an action fan Putting some action sand in my action pan That is my action plan to action stand in action land On the mike MCB Voodoo doctor the caveman petting an octopus with my hair uncombed Animating bass rotating cheese grating MCB three times a lady Back with a purple mike and google eyes Plaid colored book bag and super-size fries Fun F-U-N that spells awesome Back with my class action paroxetine lawsuit On the cut what Driving my action truck covered in action smut And everybody knows that my hair is permed Cuz otherwise how could it breed such worms Yeah good rapper blacker than dark matter Putting cream on crackers Alright now let me ask a question to everybody on the left Do you all wanna party? And now everyone says yes Alright now let me ask a question to everybody on the right Do you all wanna party? But they shoot me and now I die On the mike MCB Voodoo doctor the caveman petting an octopus with my hair uncombed

Here I am the man With the hands that come grabbing at I got hands that really grab I have seventeen vials of crack When I rap I like rapping slow There I told you so now you know Now I’m out here in knee-deep snow Wearing a mask but no clothes I hate music so I make rap I have seventeen vials of crack I got hands that really grab Try to avoid them if you can You can’t avoid them they keep grabbing Now I’m acting really sassy Wearing strange elastic masking Coming towards you and I’m clasping Who’s that man with the grabbing hands Now that I got you in my grip Here let me show you something quick Come here closer listen to this I am pregnant with someone’s fish Now I chain you upon the wall Then I start to breathe hard and loud Now you hear a squishy sound Now there’s a fish head sticking out Who’s that man with the grabbing hands

MCB above the law Holding the microphone in my paw Combing my bald spot gargling suds Filling my gumball machine with drugs OK I think I’ve told you enough My retainer case looks like a hockey puck And this isn’t even my real face My real face is a plastic bag Who is fresh now I’m asking y’all I could rhyme with doll I could rhyme with mall I could stop this tape right here if I need to C3PO R2D2 Who is dope now I’m telling you I could rhyme with blue I could rhyme with shoe I could stop this tape right here if I want Arthur Schopenhauer Immanuel Kant I joined Sasquatch to watch for snatch But I found too much and had to put some back I’m MCB totally neat And every single night I need a new bed sheet I built a gigantic robot camel That I had to dismantle cuz it ate my sandal Don’t stop now do not stop Yeah MCB is reaching the top And if you try to stop him you’ll get hurt Cuz he’s going so fast he will rip your shirt Who is fresh now I’m asking y’all I could rhyme with doll I could rhyme with mall I could stop this tape right here if I need to C3PO R2D2 Who is dope now I’m telling you I could rhyme with blue I could rhyme with shoe I could stop this tape right here if I want Arthur Schopenhauer Immanuel Kant

What’s my name I’m telling you plain My name is MCB the Dane Yeah you heard right I’m the king of Denmark I’m out joyriding Kierkegaard’s car Oh no MCB you’re insane How you dare claim you’re the Dane What who dares claim I’ll have them slain I’m circling the city with a siege by train MCB although it pains us greatly We have to arrest you for acting so crazy You can’t arrest me and here’s the reason I’m MCB the Dane and that’s treason